Cheery Thoughts, Hooray!

I don't have breast cancer, hooray! I announced in the comments section of my last post that my three lumps turned out to be non-cancerous, and Tet has nick-named them my booblets. I have thus tried to come up with individual names for each breast lump (they're so small that they can only be detected via breast ultrasound), and have come up with:

1) Paris (after ultra-whore Paris Hilton)
2) Lindsey (after recently revealed bisexual Lindsey Lohan)
3) Mortimer VIII (after my series of Pets of the same name; yes, I killed my plant)

Also, I just came back from a gruelling 5-hour testing/interview process at a call center. Passed everything but when it came down to the signing part, their contract was. Fucking. Ridiculous.

I won't go into details due to those dreary non-disclosure clauses, but to E-*******, I (and my booblets) have only one thing to say to you: